A Horse's Bond

All friendships start somewhere. Some are closer then others. They can form out of necessity, similarities or in some cases the start is barely remembered. This friendship has formed out of necessity, the necessity was on the horse's end. I will be sharing some photos of this horse to show how far she has come. The early photos you will see how she was neglected, starved and mistreated. I tend to take in rescues and this was my first horse and probably my last rescue horse. I will be honest I do not know how people can do this to an animal. Frankly, if you cannot take care of animals, whether it is due to time constraints, a lack of interest or in most cases selfishness just do not have them. An animal that is domesticated relies on you for everything, they are vulnerable and to mistreat them shows a person's true character. Also, God calls us to be stewards of the earth and the animals it contains. Yes, they serve a purpose but I do not think God who is the creator of all things intended for any animal to be abused no matter the situation.

It has been a long journey with this horse and one that has been met with extreme frustration and sadness that only someone who has been around a horse can explain. I have not ever been as close to tears as I have been with this horse. I will explain as we move along. The story is not the best but there are moments of laughter. The ending will be sure to make anyone glad so bare with me as I walk through the time with the horse.

To start I must say this is the first and only horse I have ever owned. It was not necessarily planned. I am also someone that his only experience with a horse was riding a scripted trail ride with a horse that was well into its 20s and was sauntering about. I do not think he cared that I was sitting on his back. Actually, even if I wanted to get him to do something he probably would of just ignored me. The other experience was with two unbroken Clydesdale horses that loved pets but if they saw you in the pasture you best be fast and duck and roll because Charlie, the gelding, was going to put you in the dirt if he got ahold of you and fast.

To this day I am not really a fan of horses and now I have two. My wife loves horses and has a young gelding of her own and I have my Liberty (that's the horses name). She will be with me until she dies and hopefully she gets to live a long life free of anymore torment. So how did I come to own a horse that I did not buy and had no intention to buy you ask? Let's start at the beginning.

The horse came to me from some people that I know and they told me that the horse needed a place to pasture because the previous place was no longer an option. I was very clear with them that the horse could come (I did not know the extent of the abuse) but only if they came and helped with the horse which they promised would be regularly. They also gave me their word that they would help get the horse rideable. For these two agreements I was willing to let the horse come. I am glad the horse came but the promises were never kept. The horse was basically just dumped on me with basically no help besides coming over twice because I forced the issue. Essentially I was left with a horse that was abused, had not been ridden in years and a lack of knowledge about horses. A recipe for disaster.

I am no horse guy but the picture below was how she came to me. I knew from the start just looking at her something was wrong. There was no barrel chest, she was not filled out and truthfully she looked sickly. On top of that she was timid and stand offish. Always keeping her head up and tilted away. At the same time she craved attention so bad she would follow me around and force her way wherever she could. As someone who rescues dogs this was all I needed to know that this was not going to be an easy thing. On top of this I was not married to my wife at the time, so I was working full time, managing my property and had no help. I did not even have the pasture fenced off yet! So this horse had free reign of the property. A horse that has been abused, undisciplined and having no boundaries is a recipe for disaster which I was sure to find out quickly.

Once the horse was on the property I had a corral that my thought was I could move every week. That is comical to even think about she ate through the feed in a matter of days. Also, to make things worse while working full time and moving this corral every other day by myself, Liberty would cry and neigh all night long when in the corral. She loved when I was near by and we worked through the initial process of her letting me rub her nose, her back and eventually her ears. She loved that, could not get enough of it and was sure to let me know if I stopped too soon. The issue was I could not keep up with the movement of the corral so I made the decision to open the corral and let her eat. I really wanted her to eat and did not want her feeling like she could not get enough. I intended to leave the door open for the corral so she could go in and out of the corral if she wanted too.

The issue with this is Liberty was not halter broke and once free we began her favorite game of catch me if you can. I know this is something a lot of horses do but she is really good at it when she is in the mood. Needless to say I let her loose and she was free. The first week, she would prance, run and roll around. I do not think I have seen a horse show so much excitement and joy. She was happy and in the moment I was glad for that alone. Eventually she got bored though and became needy. She had to be either with me or an animal. All I had to offer at the time was a new rescue puppy, a rescue American Bulldog that I have had for years and a few chickens.

The American Bulldog and Liberty loved each other. They would walk around eating grass together. Race around the pasture and then roll in the dirt together. It was cool but a bit nerve racking when I would call the dog and both the dog and horse would come flying to me at full speed. The horse stopping last minute to stand over me. I did not care for this at all but she always stopped and would wait for a few pets before sauntering away. This happened for a bit before things turned quite frustrating and the horse became destructive.

As she settled into her new home I came to find that she had a absolute distaste for animals that were kenneled or locked up. The newest addition of my ranch was a puppy, she was a horribly abused red healer. One of the worst I have dealt with from cowering when moving your hand, trembling if you raised your voice and a complete panic if she got food. When at work I had to keep the puppy in a kennel which was not my preferred idea but she was a danger to herself and had to be kept somewhere when I was not home. This lasted about two days before the horse one day after I let the puppy out decided the kennel was going to be no more. She trampled it and I mean completely destroyed and pranced off into the pasture like she just had a major victory. I was not thrilled but not overly upset. I wish this was the only thing but nope there was more to come.

At the time I had a small run for my chickens and they were not free ranging yet due to them being too young. One Sunday I woke up to the horse having completely knocked down the run and basically scattered it all around. I guess she decided it was time for the chickens to be free. Now I was upset because this was costing me money and time. The worst one was yet to come. The horse began following me around almost inseparable and would push up on me as much as she could. I did not like this because the horse was not respecting my space at all. I would sit on the pier and she would come put her head on my shoulder, I would be working in the barn and she would come barging in. Basically if she knew I was outside she was going to find away to be right by me. To this day if I am working around her she will follow me around right at my heels. I do not mind this now because she has learned to respect boundaries, she is halter broke and has her place now. It is on going training but she is light years better.

Outside she began to push on the windows of the house or stare into the kitchen. Eventually neighing if I did not come pay attention to her. Until one day I came home and she had kicked out my window. I am not joking, she straight up kicked my family room window out, shattering it everywhere. I had enough at this point and began trying to halter train her. This was a nightmare. I had no clue what I was doing and she knew it. She fought me every which way. Ripping her head up and away, running away or turning on me. Eventually I would get it on her but then she would basically try and rip my arm out of my socket and pull away. This led me to walking with her around the property for long periods of time. Keeping her head below mine and only allowing her to stop when I said. She did start to get the hang of it but at the same time only if the halter was on and if it wasn't she was going to do whatever she wanted.

This led me to start to try and get fence put in. Another thing that I was going to learn was much more tedious and labor intensive if you are doing it by hand in 110 degree heat. Also, the halter encouraged Liberty to really be on my heels in the pasture. Even to the point where she decided to push me into the barbed wire while I was working. Needless to say she got a good spank for that one and to this day does not push up on me unless I start to nuzzle her first. All of this as it was, was bad enough and I wish I could say it got better and stayed that way but sadly I cannot not.

I will pause for a moment before sharing one of the worst moments of my life in owning livestock to this day. Up to this point we had moved along back quite well. She was starting to fatten up and look like a healthy horse. She was beginning to learn space and respect it. She was not as timid and really showed affection to me. Even to the point where I could call her and she would come. So there was a lot of good even though there was a ton of frustration. The thing is most of it was on me not the animal. You cannot expect an animal to do what you want it to do or stay where you want it if you are not working with it or set up for the animal. I was learning about as much as the horse was. At this point I could tell there was a change in Liberty and even the way she looked at me could tell there was at least a primitive level of trust. She had food, she had care and she was not going to be neglected or abused anymore.

So moving on to the nightmare that I still wish I could go back and change. As a young horse that is coming back to heath and being a mare she went into heat. This is not a bad thing but the issue is my neighbor had a big stallion that found this out faster then I could. All I knew is she was much more excitable and making a lot of noise at times. One day I came home and to my amazement there was a second black horse standing on my property that was quite larger then my horse. So now I was extremely at a lost. What in the world was I going to do? How am I going to separate these two animals? As mine is barely halter broke and the stallion... well I have no clue how the animal is going to be with me. I am also not naive enough to not figure out why he was with her. I did get ahold of my neighbor and they came and helped get their horse away and home. The bad thing was this was going to happen 3 more times. The last time getting my horse pregnant which was not what I wanted nor was I set up to have happen. I also did not know this at the time. The last time I had to wrangle the two horse myself and the stallion was having none of it. Trying to keep me away at all cost. Even to the point of getting aggressive with me until something happened that shocked me. The stallion started pounding the ground and snorting, a clear challenge to me. While he started to close the distance to me and I was wondering if I was going to have to shoot this big animal. Liberty cut in front, body checking him and standing between me and the stallion. If he moved she did, blocking me and staying in between. Even to the point of letting me slip a halter around her neck which in turn let me slip one over his. Tying them both to the tree and ending the experience I did not care to repeat.

This was the last time the horses would meet but at this time I did not realize they had already accomplished what they intended. When I realized she was pregnant I had already pushed her out to different pasture with a friend of mine. As I was not equipped to deal with her at the moment anymore as life had changed. We did what we could and tried to make her as comfortable as possible. One thing looking back was we did not have the best feed available which I wish I could have changed as she was getting close to delivery, I was pretty excited to have a foal around. She was extremely affectionate when I came to visit her and could barely wait to have me come give her pets and rubs. I have also never been apart of something like this, a live birth of an animal, so I was very excited.

Eventually the day came and I got the call that Liberty was in suspected labor. I was supposed to be leaving for a vacation in the next day or two but I hurried over there. For the most part the beginning part of labor was slow and non eventful. She would stand and then lay down alternating ever so often but was intent to be left alone. Occasional checks showed that the foal was making progress, slow, but making progress. It was of course late at night when this occurred. There was a noticeable pause and I realized something was not right. Liberty was not acting right. She seemed in distress. I was concerned but my lack of knowledge really stopped me from doing anything. My first idea was to call the nearest vet, who flat out refused to come out. Said he would operate but only if I got the horse to him. This was just not an option, the horse was in complete distress and was laying down. Moving her would have resulted in death of both her and the foal. That was not something I was willing to risk.

At this point checking Liberty again showed that the foal was right about to be born but I could not get a sign of life. I was unsure what to do and Liberty was pushing hard. To make matters worse a thunderstorm decided to roll in with some of the most majestic lightening bolts flying across the skies and then the rains came. I did not want to have Liberty's head laying in the mud so I went around and had her put her head in my lap. The foal did come out at this point and was stuck. It was also upside down. Immediately I knew this was a death sentence. Looking back I think Liberty knew. She let out a cry on my lap and just lay there. I was in shock, wishing what I knew to be true was not. I had a horse that was in mourning on my lap. Anyone that wants to argue with me that animals do not mourn have never been in a traumatic situation with an animal. Liberty seemed like she was done not only with the birth but also with life. The strength of a horse seemed to disappear and she seemed to be content with dying at that moment.

I knew the foal had died upon birth and there was nothing I could do. I called my then girlfriend who is now my wife. Knowing she had been apart of 1,000s of births I asked if she could come help. A terrible call to make to someone you had only been seeing for a month or so. She came and assessed the situation and I told her I wanted to save Liberty and give her a chance. My wife did just that she was able to turn the baby without doing anymore damage and we got the foal removed. Liberty seemed to have a bit of life return. She did eventually get up and started sniffing around where the foal should of been. The sadness that was given off was one that I do not care to be a part of ever again. The nightmare finally ended and after a week or so Liberty was able to return to pasture and recovering. Upon marrying my wife we either keep the horse with us along with the gelding or have the horses at her family's ranch.

Liberty is forever to live a life of comfort. She is still going to be rideable, something that is still be worked on but for what she has been through she has earned an easier life. She has gone through more then most animals ever do. She has survived it all. Even from my few years with her and especially after the traumatic birth there is a level of bond between the horse and I. An understanding that can only be created from going through something like that. There just seems to be a way she communicates when I put my head against hers, like she knows it is going to be okay. Even though if she gets the opportunity she will be the first horse to play "catch me if you can". As much as it frustrates me chasing her down, every time she stops and lowers her head for me to bring her back. Then waits for me to give her the pets that she can never seem to get enough of.

Anyone that has had a horse and actually done life with that horse knows what I am talking about. There is a bond between horse and its person. It is something that is hard to break and not normally is until death. The cowboys know this and talk about their horse. A cowboy is not a cowboy without their horse. I am not talking about someone who has a horse and it is a lawn ornament or someone who goes trail riding a few times a year. That is nothing more then a hobby. I am talking about the bond that can only be created between a horse and its person from going through the worst in life.

Liberty and I have gone through her comeback from neglect and abuse, the process of building trust and attachment, the frustration of lack of boundaries, training and the loss of a foal. I may not be a horse guy or even a cowboy but if you ask anyone that is they will tell you from what I listed about the horse and I are riding partners for life... when we get to that point...